Mom's Running It Blog

HEALTHY MARRIAGE TIPS

10 Ways Couples Can Keep Their Relationship Spicy

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I get asked often how Dane and I have such a positive, thriving relationship. To make sure I’m completely transparent, this isn’t my first relationship; I'm divorced more than once. Reverse engineered made me an expert on how to have a successful relationship. Ironic, how that worked out?

Another thing that made me an expert on this topic is that Dane and I didn’t always have a good relationship. Our relationship, like many, went from really good, not good, bad, super awful, ugly, splitting up,…

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Best Marriage Advice Truths

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It's interesting what I've written about in the last almost 9 years I've had this blog. I wrote through a divorce and all I divulged was that I was moving and feeling more stress than normal. There was absolutely no information about the divorce whatsoever. I'd like to think it's entirely due to wanting to protect the other party, as he isn't co-writing to share his side of things, but if I'm more raw, it's because I've felt embarassment over relationships that have ended. The same goes moving f…

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The Feeling of Failure After Divorce

It’s hard to be the bad guy. The bitch. The one who pulled the plug. The fall-guy. It’s interesting being the one that finally said “enough!”. Not once, mind you, but 3 times. Three times I said, “I do”, three times I gave it my all, and three times I filed for divorce. It’s the only thing I felt I failed at, my only embarrassment, and the only thing I’ve tried not to discuss. Until now. I’ve heard it said that a woman takes longer to be done with a relationship, but when that happens, there’s n…

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Dating Advice: How to Convert a Runner

There was a period of time in my life that I was single. Fourteen years ago I found myself divorced.

My first blind date via a friend and my daughter asked me, "Don't you want to date a runner?”.   I wanted someone who had the same desire to live a healthy lifestyle. I wanted to be on the same page with exercise and diet.   Someone who understood my running disease. Someone who would buy me running socks for the heck of it and ask me regularly if I needed new running shoes. Perhaps a man who …

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The Give and Take in Relationships

Anyone who said relationships are easy was either delusional or not in a relationship.  Great relationships take a lot of give and take, compromise, communication, and work.  When things are easy and the sailing is smooth, it's fun to have a partner in crime.  Rainbows and unicorns and pot of gold, skipping, euphoric kind of great.  Those times should be cherished because the seasons of change happen to all of us and weathering the storms together is a lot more difficult. 

Once you've been th…

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The Importance of Dating & Romance in Marriage

Date night is a big deal in our home. So much so that when Dane and I didn't make it out for a couple of weeks, Alana (with Gabe's help) made us a gift to remind us that we need to go. The kids know us having some alone time is important because we've taught them that it is.  Some weeks it can't or doesn't happen and we're always striving to find some sort of balance between the demands of work, kids and us.

Sometimes having a romance with the same person is challenging.  But I remind myself …

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How to "Date Night" & The Rules to Follow

Date night is nearly non-negotiable.  It's almost always on Saturday night, however, we've been known to get a little crazy and go on Sunday. Dane and I trade weeks.  I plan one, he plans the next.  

So here's how we "date night".  And we have a few rules we follow.  No being whiny about what the other person chooses.  No relationship discussions - this is the time to build each other up, not complain.  Our favorite thing to do is to eat dinner.  Well, MY favorite thing.  I like to get dinner d…

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How to Maintain Intimacy - The Definitive Guide

The only constant in my life is change.  Some big, some small but all things impact balance.

There is nothing wrong with balancing alone. In a healthy relationship, balancing life WITH someone can be more difficult but much more rewarding. Today I'm broaching the topic of having a partner.  I was married previously and, although I am now divorced, I would consider it a success for a few reasons.  We took the things we are good at - being friends and parenting our children - and maintained the…

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Elements of Effective Communication

The only constant in my life is change.  Some big, some small but all things impact balance.

There is always so much in life we juggle

We juggle so much in life.

 Can phones

Communication.  One of the most important aspects of everything we do.  We communicate with how we dress, how we present ourselves, our body language, our voice intonation.  Communication has changed dramatically over the years of my life with the advent of the internet.  We can email, Facebook, Skype, Facetime, text, talk to Siri, use the phone.  We can communicate sile…

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When One Door Closes - Finding a New Beginning

I did not expect to date again for a long time.  I was spending time contentedly alone and had determined that's how it would remain until the kids got quite a bit older.  With over a decade of foster care under my belt I have learned that I should never say I am done with "having" children but they were certainly no longer expected.  But I digress....

I don't NEED a relationship to feel good about myself or "complete".  But I do WANT someone in my life - a partner, friend, confidant, lover. …

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